
LGBT persons have suffered rejection by friends and family due to religious teachings that declare being LGBT is an abomination. The greatest loss is the family. Growing up in a family is not easy for many people, regardless of sexual orientation. Often, families are dysfunctional and cause lifelong problems due to physical and mental abuse inflicted on children. The LGBT community suffers rejection that leads to loneliness and difficult relationships in adulthood.
Sitting at my dining room table, I realized what the dining room table symbolizes in a family and in the culture of society. The table is where the family gathers for meals, conversation, playing games, and doing work. It is the hub of family life.
In religion, the table is the symbol of the covenant relationship between God and the universe. The table represents God’s provision for life’s needs, including love, mercy, grace, forgiveness, and acceptance. The table is a sacred space where one can encounter God and receive God’s love from those gathered at the table.
LGBT persons are rejected from family tables and the table of God in many religious organizations. Yet, there is still a need for the family unit. So, LGBT persons can find family in what is known as a chosen family.
Here is my view of a chosen family:
Chosen Family (n.):
A circle of individuals—often fellow gay men or LGBTQ+ people—who form bonds of love, loyalty, and mutual support, not based on genetics or legal ties, but on shared identity, care, and the commitment to stand in for one another where blood relatives have failed to show acceptance.
This family:
- Affirms who you are without condition
- Celebrates your joys and mourns your losses as their own
- Walks with you through pain, healing, growth, and becoming
- Shares traditions, holidays, meals, and memories not out of obligation, but out of devotion
- Is sacred, chosen, and fiercely real
My goal, my ministry, is to promote Chosen families for the LGBT persons who are alienated and rejected by blood relatives and by the religious organizations that deny them the right to participate.
I call this ministry The Siete, Spanish for seven. Seven is a symbol denoting completeness, spirituality, and mystery. In Christianity, it is the symbol of completeness and perfection. The number connotes transformation.
May God open the eyes of those who reject and provide those who choose to receive us as God’s children. May we learn the meaning of Galatians 3:8!
